Marriage and/or Relationship Issues, Sexual Assault, Stress Management Shame Counselling & Therapy

Marriage and/or Relationship Issues, Sexual Assault, Stress Management

Entering into a relationship means merging your life with another person, understanding his or her flaws, quirks and beliefs. With marriage rates declining and divorce statistics set at 50%, it is clear that people are increasingly challenged by marriage and relationship issues, and many lack effective ways to address them. So how can we bridge the gap to understanding our partners better and enjoying romantic bliss?

Many factors affect the interpersonal relationship between two partners who are a couple and sometimes it's hard to see the cause of conflict or friction in a relationship. While some people find divorce to be the best or only option, other people speak to counsellors and psychologists  in a bid to try salvage the relationship.

Signs that indicate a need for couples counselling include poor communication in a relationship, affairs, living past one another, inability to resolve marriage of couples' issues, and acting out negative feelings. When divorce seems like the only option, or if a couple is staying together for the kids' sake, that's a sure sign that therapy is needed.

Therapists do not necessarily  believe that all marriages can be salvaged, but counselling can often help even some of the most challenged relationships.  Through talk therapy, the couple will discover again why they fell in love and what they can do to get back to that place in their marriage. They use a range of effective, proven methods to help couples in any situation to restore intimacy and move past the hurt and wounds to a safe and comfortable place.

The concrete tools used by marriage therapists provide guidance in a supportive and encouraging setting and empower clients to restructure their thoughts and emotions. It helps the couple to work with each other, instead of on one another, helping each individual to find the person he or she is at the core level and to build a happy union.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who works with  couples you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

Sexual assault or abuse in childhood often causes psychological and emotional difficulties as the victim grows up. A child who is abused by a parent, is likely to suffer from severe anxiety, low self-esteem, uncontrollable anger, depression and intimacy issues. However, sexual assault is not limited to children, and it can harm an adult emotionally too.

Immediately after sexual assault, a person may not immediately experience pain or fear. They may even experience moments of pleasure, which can cause a lot of confusion and inner turmoil. They may feel betrayed if the abuser is a relative or acquaintance, but at the same time, feel guilty for reporting the sexual assault and getting the abuser in trouble. Abusers often lie to their victims, or reward them, and threats can deepen the emotional trauma.

A victim of sexual assault will often have trouble coping with relationships that are growing close, or with people physically touching them. When starting a relationship, memories will start to occur and they will cause trouble with intimacy in the relationship. Some people who have experienced sexual assault will become promiscuous, which can cause even more guilt.

It is essential for sexual assault survivors to receive counselling from a professional psychologist who is experienced in sexual assault. A therapist will help the victim to work through emotions and help clarify his or her choices. Working through the emotions of anger, guilt and shame will help to facilitate emotional healing. EMDR has been proven a very effective treatment for post traumatic stress disorder in sexual assault victims.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who offers sexual assault counselling to address your emotional healing issues you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

While stress is a normal part of our modern, everyday lives, it can also have dramatic side effects. Chronic stress can lead to behavioral issues, such as drug abuse that can harm relationships. However, most commonly, chronic stress can affect a person's physical health in a number of ways. Many people avoid asking for help in coping with stress management, accepting it as a common hazard of today's fast-paced life.

Yes, at some point everyone suffers from challenges with stress management, but if at any point in time you feel like you have trouble handling it, it is time to get help. Signs that you are not coping with stress management includes a change in your sleeping or eating habits, feeling physically unwell (headaches, ulcers, frequent colds and flu), reduced productivity and decreased pleasure in activities you enjoyed before.

Stress is common when dealing with life changes or situations such as job losses, getting married, breakups or divorces, discrimination, parenting, moving house, death of a pet or loved one, being diagnosed with a serious medical condition.  

Therapy can help you to better deal with stress management issues. Negative moods reduce the quality of several aspects of our lives, including productivity and interpersonal relationships. Through cognitive restructuring, negative thoughts can be challenged and rescripted to help you create a more positive mindset.

Stress can often cloud the validity of our interpretations of certain events and circumstances, and cognitive restructuring challenges those assumptions. In the case of invalid interpretations, the way we think about situations naturally changes, which has a positive effect on our moods and ability to handle stress better.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who will help you manage stress more effectively you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

Shame Counselling & Therapy

There are a variety of approaches to address the issue of shame.  One of them is the Shame Resilience method is based on the research of Brené Brown, Ph.D. LMSW. 

Shame Resilience is the developed ability to practice authenticity when we experience shame, to move through the experience without sacrificing our values, and to come out on the other side of the shame experience with more courage, compassion, and connection than we had going into it.

Shame Resilience is about moving from shame to empathy- the real antidote to shame. Self-compassion is also critically important, because when we’re able to be tender with ourselves in the midst of shame we’re more likely to reach out, connect and experience empathy.

Other approaches, like Complex Integration of Multiple Brain Systems (CIMBS)  uses what is called a systems perspective that can address how an individual has learned to respond due to early trauma and or other developmental experiences.

Approaches to shame are not limited to the above.  There are many other therapies that address feeling.

If you do contact a therapist regarding shame issues please make sure that you ask them about their training in this area and choose a therapist whose approach makes sense to you.

 

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Tasha Johal

M.A., RCC
    • Online booking
How connected do you feel? To others? To yourself? As a therapist, I emphasize the relationship and connection to one's body and mind through a trauma-informed, culturally-responsive, holistic lens.... Read more