Depression, Grief and Loss - General, Perfectionism Shame Counselling & Therapy

Depression, Grief and Loss - General, Perfectionism

Depression is the most common psychological condition, and most people experience it at one point or another in their lives.

Symptoms of depression include lethargy, low self esteem, a feeling of sadness, helplessness, hopelessness, anxiety, dysphoric mood and even suicidal thoughts. People who are depressed usually feel a lack of energy and a lack of pleasure and they may be agitated or irritable.

Since there are so many causes to depression, which boils down to a natural response to life experiences (a defence mechanism), each situation warrants a thorough investigation into the exact catalyst. Depending on what causes a specific incidence of depression, a treatment plan can be developed to help the individual deal with his or her emotions.

Some people are predisposed to depression in that it can run in the family. In many cases, it is learned when someone is constantly exposed to it.

Counselling can help a person to adapt to life changes that are causing grief, particularly with bereavement or marital issues. Systemic therapy is helpful in family therapy, where the efforts of the whole family can help the individual. Psychodynamic therapy helps a person to find the hidden psychological defences that cause problems to manifest. Cognitive behavioral therapy focuses on the problem at hand, providing solutions to day-to-day issues and finding ways to restructure negative thought patterns.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who has training and experience in depression counselling you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

Grief is a natural part of dealing with the loss of a loved one, or a situation, or a way in which we see ourselves. Loss requires that we change the way things used to be and find a new way to restructure our lives accordingly. It's common for people to fear change, particularly if a part of us, or a person we loved deeply, is no longer there. It leaves a gap that has to be filled, but nothing can replace the person who has left us behind.

People deal with loss in many different ways, but the desired end result is the same - trying to piece together the puzzle to the best of our ability, without the missing piece. We also go through the various stages of grief at varying speeds and intensities. Dealing with all the emotions that form part of grief is what makes support so very important.

Time is of the essence during the grieving period, and something we sometimes tend to rush. That's why it's so useful to speak to a therapist who does grief counselling during this time.

A therapist will help you understand that what you are feeling is completely normal and even expected. Medical professionals are aware of the wide range of natural responses to grief and loss and are generally reluctant to diagnose mental illness while a person is in a period of bereavement. However, if depression is present, medication is likely to be prescribed.

Grief therapy will help you to accept the loss and be able to talk about it without breaking down. You will learn to identify and express your emotions regarding the loss and learn to make decisions without your loved one.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist does grief counselling to address your grief and loss you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

Perfectionism is considered as a personality trait among many mental health practitioners.  Perfectionists tend to view projects or tasks that are not perfect done, as unworthy. Unless they know that they can do something perfectly, they are unlikely to take it on. They tend not to care much about the learning process while completing a task, but rather about the end project, which, for them, is the most important aspect of any project they undertake.

Procrastination is a great obstacle with people who are perfectionists. They usually don't want to start a task until they are sure that they can do it perfectly. It's common for them to spend an enormous amount of time on a project, making sure that it is done to perfection. Yet, perfectionism prevents these people from appreciating a job well done. Instead, they don't believe that anything they do is good enough and they constantly compare their results with that of other people. They become fixated on achieving perfection.

There is a correlation between perfectionism and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), and some perfectionists also have OCD.  However, not all people with OCD are perfectionists. While most people with an ambition to succeed and therefore strive to excel in their pursuits, they are not necessarily perfectionists.

Therapy can be very helpful in treating perfectionism. Therapy will help the individual to reframe their thinking to change the end goal of his or her undertakings. A therapist may often help perfectionists recognize that some of the most successful people are not perfectionists at all.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who offers therapies to address your perfectionism or OCD issues, you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

Shame Counselling & Therapy

There are a variety of approaches to address the issue of shame.  One of them is the Shame Resilience method is based on the research of Brené Brown, Ph.D. LMSW. 

Shame Resilience is the developed ability to practice authenticity when we experience shame, to move through the experience without sacrificing our values, and to come out on the other side of the shame experience with more courage, compassion, and connection than we had going into it.

Shame Resilience is about moving from shame to empathy- the real antidote to shame. Self-compassion is also critically important, because when we’re able to be tender with ourselves in the midst of shame we’re more likely to reach out, connect and experience empathy.

Other approaches, like Complex Integration of Multiple Brain Systems (CIMBS)  uses what is called a systems perspective that can address how an individual has learned to respond due to early trauma and or other developmental experiences.

Approaches to shame are not limited to the above.  There are many other therapies that address feeling.

If you do contact a therapist regarding shame issues please make sure that you ask them about their training in this area and choose a therapist whose approach makes sense to you.

 

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Karen Goble

M.A., RCC
I’m a psychotherapist (MA, RCC) who offers therapy with heart. My private practice is a safe, nurturing space for acceptance and growth. I’m committed to helping my clients move courageously beyond... Read more

Lisa Voth

MC, RCC
    • Video on profile
    • Online booking
Three common things I hear: you have some understanding of why something happens intellectually but that doesn't stop it from happening or feeling bad. you can't figure out why you keep... Read more