Robert Phillips

After seven years as a counsellor and about 7,000 hours of therapy completed, I’ve learned a lot about what seems to work and what doesn’t. To begin with, when I ask my clients about their previous counselling experience, they often tell me that their counsellor tried to squeeze them into a certain modality or counselling theory, regardless of their personality or communication style. 

My practice is about the opposite: I believe my job is to become a new therapist for each client. I might pull from time-tested ideas and fundamentals, but I’ll always try to be your therapist. That’s my main goal. 

This means being flexible. Some people benefit from simply having a safe place to talk, while others prefer a more hands-on approach featuring problem solving and experimentation. Others want me to use specific techniques like EMDR and Inner Child therapy, and that works fine too. My job is to bend to you, not the other way around. 

Speaking of experimentation, this is a big part of my practice when appropriate. By experimentation I mean helping the client to “try on” different behaviours in their lives and then report back on how they went. For example, if a client’s partner is doing something they don’t like, I might have them communicate in new ways or practice asking for what they want, with my help of course. Action and change are best friends. 

Our first session will feature a conversation about where you’re coming from in terms of relationships. We’ll talk about caregivers, siblings, and other important people in your childhood and current life. I always start here, because it seems silly to me to start working on your life without having this foundation in place. It would be like doing half of my job. I want to know the context before anything else.  

From there, we’ll find our way together. I’m hopeful that real change occurs in your life. I’ve seen people transform with good therapy. I hope this happens to you too, if you want it to. 

I also believe it’s important to be holistic about change, and to think bigger than just the psychological aspects you might traditionally find in counselling. We might talk about how exercise fits into your life, how you feel about substance use, and even medication if it fits. I’m not a doctor or personal trainer or naturopath, but we can still explore these topics in therapy. Then you can decide if you want to discuss them with the appropriate professional. 

Outside of my work, I love playing softball (I’m on two teams here in Victoria), playing drums (in a couple of bands too!), spending time with friends and family, and exploring this city that I love. Four years ago I started weight lifting and it has changed my life. I have a loving partner and two cats…you might see them in our calls (the cats, not my partner).