Areas of practice
- Adolescent Issues
- Child Behaviour
- Cross Cultural Issues
- Divorce and/or Separation
- Family Issues
- Marriage and/or Relationship Issues
- Men's Issues
- Parenting Issues
- Pre-Marital Counselling
- Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
- Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT)
- Interpersonal Psychotherapy
- Marriage & Couples Counselling
- Online / Virtual
- Psychodynamic Therapy
- Video Counselling
As my client, your well-being will always be my guiding focus. You will be valued, supported and respected in our work together. Like the roots below affecting the tree above, the inner worlds of our mind and body affect the outer aspects of our lives – this is a core value behind my work at Tree Roots Counselling.
Working with Individuals & Couples
When you are stressed, you can react with fight, flight, or freeze, affecting your daily life and relations with others. To restore functioning and strengthen social connections, our work will be informed by three guiding values:
1) Fostering safety: Feelings of safety allows for the integration of thoughts, emotions and body sensations, which is the source of resilience and growth. For this to happen, emotional safety needs to be established in you and in your relationships. In couple therapy, fostering safety involves each partner developing a genuine effort to empathize and accept each other’s needs and perspectives without judgment.
2) Forming new awareness by understanding the reasons behind your actions: Together, we will explore how both past and present exchanges may contribute to your stuck relationship patterns. These patterns are safely recalled and reprocessed to form new meaning. For instance, discover how patterns of pursuit and withdrawal such as demand/criticize; defend/distance/stonewall; and shut down/shut out are underlying attempts for:
- Protection—seeking independence from others which may create struggles within (affecting sense of self)
- Connection—seeking constructive dependence with others which may create struggles between (affecting relationships)
3) With this awareness of pursuit and withdrawal patterns comes developing strategies for protection (how to express and meet your own needs without hurting others), and connection (how to show care and compassion without turning others away).
Instead of being stuck as an unwitting creator and victim of negative cycles, new patterns with others can be created. Instead of mistrust, isolation and power struggle, new bonds can be cultivated based on trust and respect.
Working with Parents and Families
I work with parents and families to help them understand the meaning behind their child or teen’s behaviour. Parents can shift from:
- Reacting to short-term problems to
- Responding to long-term relationship needs
From reactivity to receptivity, parents learn strategies to be present and respond to the emotional and developmental needs of their child or teen. Meaningful change begins to happen with practical tools to understand and manage behaviour–a real shift in the trajectory of your relationship. Healthier connections take shape and brains can be rewired to develop more secure attachment. In cases where there is separation or divorce, parents can learn to respectfully co-parent to raise resilient and self-regulated children who will thrive.
I live in Vancouver with my wife and three kids. Our goal is to live overseas in 2022 and experience life in a different culture. Please contact me for a free 15 minute intake or attend one of my parenting workshops.
I conduct parenting workshops in Vancouver throughout the year:
Learn how to manage your child’s behaviour and emotions while reinforcing connection so your child can thrive. Learn evidence-based strategies and tools to develop:
- emotional awareness &
- self-regulation in your child.
My work doesn't often connect me to children and families until there is some kind of crisis, and when I do see these families, I often wish I could have supported them earlier – before the fork in the road started to widen. A story to help illustrate this: My wife and I lost all of our photos in our back-up drive, most of them irreplaceable pictures of our kids. Until that point, we had no issues and were unaware that a hard drive can die unexpectedly. We wish we knew earlier. In my work, I find that parenting is similar – parents do the best they can until something comes up. My goal with these workshops is to help parents be proactive.
Please contact me for the next workshop location and details.
Client fee individuals:$120 / 50 mins
Client fee couples/families:$120 / 50 mins