Self-Esteem Issues, Sexuality Shame Counselling & Therapy

Self-Esteem Issues, Sexuality

A positive self-esteem is an essential tool to help someone function as a productive member of society. Our basic sense of worth determines how well we are able to deal with situations and how well we perform in the family, at school, at work and in life.

Having a healthy self-esteem means that we have a sense of self-worth, self-respect and the ability to find the good in yourself. On the contrary, a negative self image can lead to social anxiety, loneliness, self-criticism, shame and even anger. A person with low self-esteem often feels isolated.

Self-esteem issues are usually created in childhood when negative experiences and poor influences and reactions from caregivers stunt the development of a positive self esteem. Self-esteem can also be affected by abuse, or by being different. A person may be stigmatized for his or her social identity, race, social class, behaviors or appearance.

However, a person's self-esteem can also be challenged during adulthood when one experiences marital issues, financial problems, career glitches or legal challenges.

Therapy can help a person come to terms with self-esteem issues. A therapist will help identify the causes of self-esteem issues and help the individual to regain control over circumstances through goal-directed therapy.

It can help someone with low self-esteem to separate who they are from what they have, or how they look in order to overcome low self-esteem issues. Discovering one's worth is a great way to take control of situations and to learn to feel adequate.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who offers goal directed therapy to address your self-esteem issues, you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.
 

Sexuality is an important part of society and relationships in particular. Issues with sexuality are usually an indication of more serious relationship problems. Sex should be a natural and healthy part of a committed relationship, but problems can crop up at any time.

One partner might use the frequency of sex as an indication of their value in the relationship and a measurement as to how much he or she is loved, while the other person values intimacy. Unsatisfactory sex might reveal the partners' deeper levels of control, love and trust, and highlight issues that need further exploration.

Many issues can cause unnecessary stress in a relationship, such as negative childhood attitudes to sexuality. Cultural pressures can also place undue demands on a couple. Traumatic sexual experiences can also emerge at any time.

A therapist can help a couple deal with sexuality issues, helping them to make their own rules regarding sex. They can explore issues with sexuality, such as cultural taboos and family myths,  in a safe environment that is free from judgment.

Relationship counselling can help sexuality issues by helping the couple explore physical communication and allowing both partners to understand the meaning of sex within the bounds of the relationships. Power and control are two of the biggest issues with sexuality in a relationship, while sexual withdrawal is a way for one partner to express disappointment and anger, which are forbidden outside the bedroom.

These are just some of the myriad sexuality related issues that may cause problems in relationships, with which therapists could assist. Sexual dysfunction can be assisted through psychosexual therapy.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who offers sexual counselling and other sexuality issues you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

Shame Counselling & Therapy

There are a variety of approaches to address the issue of shame.  One of them is the Shame Resilience method is based on the research of Brené Brown, Ph.D. LMSW. 

Shame Resilience is the developed ability to practice authenticity when we experience shame, to move through the experience without sacrificing our values, and to come out on the other side of the shame experience with more courage, compassion, and connection than we had going into it.

Shame Resilience is about moving from shame to empathy- the real antidote to shame. Self-compassion is also critically important, because when we’re able to be tender with ourselves in the midst of shame we’re more likely to reach out, connect and experience empathy.

Other approaches, like Complex Integration of Multiple Brain Systems (CIMBS)  uses what is called a systems perspective that can address how an individual has learned to respond due to early trauma and or other developmental experiences.

Approaches to shame are not limited to the above.  There are many other therapies that address feeling.

If you do contact a therapist regarding shame issues please make sure that you ask them about their training in this area and choose a therapist whose approach makes sense to you.

 

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Grant McMahon

M.C., RCC
I am a Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC # 11135) and psychotherapist working in Vancouver.  I can help you if you are struggling with low mood, depression, anxiety/panic, or problems in your marriage or intimate... Read more

Olivia Kienzel

M.Couns., RCC
Olivia has more than a decade of experience as a counsellor working with clients to transform their relationship to themselves, their lives, and the people they care about. She can help you, gently, get to the root... Read more

Danielle Peloquin

M.A., RCC
    • Blog on profile
    • Online booking
Are things out of balance? Tired of the same old patterns? Stuck? Taking care of mental wellness is like maintaining a vehicle. Anxiety, depression, relationship trouble and anger may mean it's time for a tune-up.... Read more