Perfectionism, Stress Management Shame Counselling & Therapy

Perfectionism, Stress Management

Perfectionism is considered as a personality trait among many mental health practitioners.  Perfectionists tend to view projects or tasks that are not perfect done, as unworthy. Unless they know that they can do something perfectly, they are unlikely to take it on. They tend not to care much about the learning process while completing a task, but rather about the end project, which, for them, is the most important aspect of any project they undertake.

Procrastination is a great obstacle with people who are perfectionists. They usually don't want to start a task until they are sure that they can do it perfectly. It's common for them to spend an enormous amount of time on a project, making sure that it is done to perfection. Yet, perfectionism prevents these people from appreciating a job well done. Instead, they don't believe that anything they do is good enough and they constantly compare their results with that of other people. They become fixated on achieving perfection.

There is a correlation between perfectionism and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), and some perfectionists also have OCD.  However, not all people with OCD are perfectionists. While most people with an ambition to succeed and therefore strive to excel in their pursuits, they are not necessarily perfectionists.

Therapy can be very helpful in treating perfectionism. Therapy will help the individual to reframe their thinking to change the end goal of his or her undertakings. A therapist may often help perfectionists recognize that some of the most successful people are not perfectionists at all.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who offers therapies to address your perfectionism or OCD issues, you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

While stress is a normal part of our modern, everyday lives, it can also have dramatic side effects. Chronic stress can lead to behavioral issues, such as drug abuse that can harm relationships. However, most commonly, chronic stress can affect a person's physical health in a number of ways. Many people avoid asking for help in coping with stress management, accepting it as a common hazard of today's fast-paced life.

Yes, at some point everyone suffers from challenges with stress management, but if at any point in time you feel like you have trouble handling it, it is time to get help. Signs that you are not coping with stress management includes a change in your sleeping or eating habits, feeling physically unwell (headaches, ulcers, frequent colds and flu), reduced productivity and decreased pleasure in activities you enjoyed before.

Stress is common when dealing with life changes or situations such as job losses, getting married, breakups or divorces, discrimination, parenting, moving house, death of a pet or loved one, being diagnosed with a serious medical condition.  

Therapy can help you to better deal with stress management issues. Negative moods reduce the quality of several aspects of our lives, including productivity and interpersonal relationships. Through cognitive restructuring, negative thoughts can be challenged and rescripted to help you create a more positive mindset.

Stress can often cloud the validity of our interpretations of certain events and circumstances, and cognitive restructuring challenges those assumptions. In the case of invalid interpretations, the way we think about situations naturally changes, which has a positive effect on our moods and ability to handle stress better.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who will help you manage stress more effectively you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

Shame Counselling & Therapy

There are a variety of approaches to address the issue of shame.  One of them is the Shame Resilience method is based on the research of Brené Brown, Ph.D. LMSW. 

Shame Resilience is the developed ability to practice authenticity when we experience shame, to move through the experience without sacrificing our values, and to come out on the other side of the shame experience with more courage, compassion, and connection than we had going into it.

Shame Resilience is about moving from shame to empathy- the real antidote to shame. Self-compassion is also critically important, because when we’re able to be tender with ourselves in the midst of shame we’re more likely to reach out, connect and experience empathy.

Other approaches, like Complex Integration of Multiple Brain Systems (CIMBS)  uses what is called a systems perspective that can address how an individual has learned to respond due to early trauma and or other developmental experiences.

Approaches to shame are not limited to the above.  There are many other therapies that address feeling.

If you do contact a therapist regarding shame issues please make sure that you ask them about their training in this area and choose a therapist whose approach makes sense to you.

 

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Olivia Kienzel

M.Couns., RCC
Olivia has more than a decade of experience as a counsellor working with clients to transform their relationship to themselves, their lives, and the people they care about. She can help you, gently, get to the root... Read more

Soo Sen Lee

M.C., RCC
Soo Sen Lee is a Registered Clinical Counsellor who sees clients virtually, over the phone and in-person in Burnaby, BC.   Burnout, debilitating anxiety and depression, burnout, sexual assault, painful family... Read more

Amrita Dhoot

MCP, RCC
    • Online booking
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Lisa Voth

MC, RCC
    • Video on profile
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Three common things I hear: you have some understanding of why something happens intellectually but that doesn't stop it from happening or feeling bad. you can't figure out why you keep... Read more