Infidelity, Marriage and/or Relationship Issues Shame Counselling & Therapy

Infidelity, Marriage and/or Relationship Issues

Infidelity affects many relationships every year, and unless a couple works through the situation, could spell the end of a relationship. In cases where couples decide to work through the issues of infidelity, there is often a lot of strain on the relationship and therapy can help to create a fresh start.

In recent decades, extramarital affairs have become very common and couples vow to love and be faithful till death do us part, keeping that promise is a rare occurrence. While this is a small consolation, it can help to remove some of the shame the victim of infidelity may feel. However, a partner's affair is not a sign of failure on the part of the victim.

Sometimes, the other partner may be completely surprised to learn of a partner's infidelity and it can leave that person feeling shocked, devastated, confused, betrayed, aggrieved, alone and jealous. The end of a relationship can be a huge adjustment, and many people seek therapy to help them heal, recover and move forward with their lives.

Choosing to continue with the relationship after an affair is a noble choice, provided the cheating partner intends to follow through and make some important changes. A therapist will gladly help the couple to work towards their goal by helping them to explore and express their emotions in a safe space. An important starting point in dealing with infidelity is to assess each partner's level of commitment to the relationship, and to verbalize it. Therapy will help the couple to develop strategies for repairing trust and to foresee potential pitfalls, and develop strategies to avoid any habits and temptations for future failure.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who offers couples counselling to address your or your partner's infidelity issues, you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.
 

Entering into a relationship means merging your life with another person, understanding his or her flaws, quirks and beliefs. With marriage rates declining and divorce statistics set at 50%, it is clear that people are increasingly challenged by marriage and relationship issues, and many lack effective ways to address them. So how can we bridge the gap to understanding our partners better and enjoying romantic bliss?

Many factors affect the interpersonal relationship between two partners who are a couple and sometimes it's hard to see the cause of conflict or friction in a relationship. While some people find divorce to be the best or only option, other people speak to counsellors and psychologists  in a bid to try salvage the relationship.

Signs that indicate a need for couples counselling include poor communication in a relationship, affairs, living past one another, inability to resolve marriage of couples' issues, and acting out negative feelings. When divorce seems like the only option, or if a couple is staying together for the kids' sake, that's a sure sign that therapy is needed.

Therapists do not necessarily  believe that all marriages can be salvaged, but counselling can often help even some of the most challenged relationships.  Through talk therapy, the couple will discover again why they fell in love and what they can do to get back to that place in their marriage. They use a range of effective, proven methods to help couples in any situation to restore intimacy and move past the hurt and wounds to a safe and comfortable place.

The concrete tools used by marriage therapists provide guidance in a supportive and encouraging setting and empower clients to restructure their thoughts and emotions. It helps the couple to work with each other, instead of on one another, helping each individual to find the person he or she is at the core level and to build a happy union.

If you are looking for a counsellor or psychologist who works with  couples you may want to search the directory to find a professional whose approach will suit you best.

Shame Counselling & Therapy

There are a variety of approaches to address the issue of shame.  One of them is the Shame Resilience method is based on the research of Brené Brown, Ph.D. LMSW. 

Shame Resilience is the developed ability to practice authenticity when we experience shame, to move through the experience without sacrificing our values, and to come out on the other side of the shame experience with more courage, compassion, and connection than we had going into it.

Shame Resilience is about moving from shame to empathy- the real antidote to shame. Self-compassion is also critically important, because when we’re able to be tender with ourselves in the midst of shame we’re more likely to reach out, connect and experience empathy.

Other approaches, like Complex Integration of Multiple Brain Systems (CIMBS)  uses what is called a systems perspective that can address how an individual has learned to respond due to early trauma and or other developmental experiences.

Approaches to shame are not limited to the above.  There are many other therapies that address feeling.

If you do contact a therapist regarding shame issues please make sure that you ask them about their training in this area and choose a therapist whose approach makes sense to you.

 

Rene Weideman

Ph.D., R.Psych
I'm warm, kind, respectful, and perceptive I'm an experienced therapist with a very good reputation. My career has included Hospital, University, and Private Practice work I've had leadership positions... Read more